Five-Thirty AM - XL

Piya and Jiya’s wedding day was finally here.

The marriage was taking place at a hotel, since there were two weddings that would take place one after another, and there were two baraats that would be coming to claim their brides today.

The brides - Piya and Jiya - were dressed in lehengas - identical in every way, except in the colors. Jiya being the older chose traditional red for her color. Rajan wore a gold sherwani to complement her. Piya being the younger chose a burnt orange for her colors, and Anuj dressed in a deep hunter green to contrast with her flaming colors. Their jewelry was identical. Their mehendi however differed as each girl preferred to choose a design that matched their personality. While Jiya sported an ‘R’ boldly in her palm, Piya hid the ‘A’ on hers so that Anuj would have to look for it.

There was an hour between the two wedding ceremonies, so each of the girls could attend the other’s ceremony. The post-wedding reception and traditional rituals would be held together, allowing all the guests to mingle and participate in the celebrations. The night would close with fireworks before the brides went on their way to their separate in-law’s places. Of course, they’d even planned their honeymoon together, and would be traveling back to Canada together.

Jiya had been dressed and was waiting to be called down for the ceremony any time. Piya was dressed to attend Jiya’s wedding. She would change after that ceremony into her own bridal dress. Mitul and she hovered over Jiya helping her put on the last of her elaborate jewelry. There was a sense of sadness, of anticipation, of excitement, of emptiness.

Myna came barging into the room, ‘Jiya, they’ve arrived! Are you ready to go?’

Jiya nodded nervously. She headed to the mandap, surrounded by Mitul, Piya and Myna, leading her out.

As they came onto the open terrace where the wedding would be held, Mitul looked around to see if Noel had arrived. She saw him standing with their parents - his and hers, towering over almost everybody else. He wore an olive green sherwani, embellished with intricate silk embroidery at the throat and sleeves. His eyes were fixed on her.

Next to him stood Dev, dressed in a midnight blue sherwani and looking very uncomfortable in it. She glanced across at Myna to see if she’d noticed him. But Myna was fully focused on Jiya.

As Noel watched Mitul help her sister to the mandap, his eyes greedily drank her up. She was dressed in a pale copper sari, with olive green accents, almost the same color as his sherwani, with delicate silver embroidery along the borders and the free end. Since he’d seen her on Wednesday, the only contact they’d had, had been on the phone. She had been too busy with all the pre-wedding rituals. Frustrating as it was, he’d understood that family came first, for now. He expected to change all that soon, very soon.

She looked gorgeous, he thought. Earthy tones looked absolutely perfect on her. The darker tan she’d acquired in Goa, showing off the colors to perfection. The simple copper embellished jewelry she’d added, highlighted the copper in the sari. Her hair was plaited in a french braid, with tiny curls that danced around her face with each movement of her head. As she bent to help Jiya sit at the sacred fire, he noticed the glittering silver band around her waist. She stood up and for a minute, as she adjusted the end of her sari, he saw that the waistband had been wound through a glittering diamond studded ring in her belly, that had replaced the silver one. The waistband split into three separate strands that hugged her waist and hips over the sari.

He drew in a sharp breath as his eyes feasted on the ring, before he met her gaze over everyone’s heads. Her lips parted as her eyes met his, a jolt of something like electricity slashing through her. He dropped his eyes to the diamonds again, telling her what he wanted, his fingertips tingling with the need to touch it right then and there. She licked her lips, dropped her eyes, and gracefully arranged her sari, so it covered her up. He gave her a disappointed look. She smiled impishly, and then focused back on the couple in front of the fire.

Dev meanwhile was glad, so glad he’d accompanied Noel today. Myna looked like a vision to him. Her tall willowy figure draped in a pale yellow sari, delicately embroidered with silver work. It was the choli that almost made his jaw drop. The front was modest enough, but when she turned around, he saw the full expanse of her back from neck to hip, exposed to the world, thin strings of silver glittering on her sleek back holding the front in place. He swallowed as he looked at her, his heart aching as he saw the slight dark circles under her beautiful eyes. Her smile was still as beautiful, but the fire in her eyes was damped.

He still hadn’t figured out what he was going to do today, but he had to find some alone time with her. That was the only thing he was sure of.

The first wedding was over soon, with Rajan placing sindoor in Jiya’s parting, while she smiled shyly, her eyes lowered modestly.

The guests went out to snack at the buffet, while the couple and their entourages went inside to get ready for the next wedding.

Noel and Dev sat talking quietly, and the former could see that his friend was very, very strung up. Well, it was all up to Dev now. Everything else was ready. Now, if only Myna would say yes.

Kuntala, in the meantime caught up with Kamini and said, ‘is that Dev, sitting with Noel?’

Kamini looked over. ‘Yes, it is,’ she answered and turned a disinterested shoulder away.

‘He’s good looking,’ said Kuntala.

‘Hmmm... maybe,’ Kamini feigned indifference, before walking away.

Myna in the meantime, was trying to hide her nervousness, by keeping uber busy helping Piya dress. She had seen Dev standing with Noel and it had been a shock to her. She didn’t know he’d been invited! So now, she was jabbering non-stop until Piya took hold of her hands and said, ‘Myna, will you stop with the chatter? You sound like you’re the one getting married and not me.’

‘What?’ Myna was startled. ‘No. No. Why would I be the one getting married? You are, right? So let’s get this jewelry on you,’ she said, bringing up an armful of jewelry boxes to Piya.

Piya took the boxes and sat them down on the dressing table. She caught Myna’s hands in hers and decided it was time someone told her some truths.

‘You’re nervous about Dev being here, isn’t it?’ she asked.

Myna’s eyes flew to hers, startled. ‘How did you know?’ she whispered.

‘We all know, Myna. The man’s crazy about you. So how about giving him a little chance, hmm?’ she smiled gently.

‘I don’t know, Piya,’ she muttered. ‘He’s so arrogant, and rude, and brash...’

‘So were you,’ Piya pointed out. ‘Now go talk to him. Put him out of his misery and let me get dressed in peace,’ she laughingly pushed Myna out of the room. ‘And send Sami in here, first, I need help with all this,’ she added.

Myna found Sami and a few more of Piya’s friends and sent them back to her before heading to the reception area. Her heart was hammering, threatening to choke her, she felt nauseous, and feverish, her hands were cold, her cheeks were hot. But she was going to do this. She was, after all, Myna Imani. She straightened her back, lifted her chin, and walked in.

Dev sat beside Noel barely listening to what he had to say. His eyes were scanning the room continuously and but he couldn’t see her. He turned his head to look at Noel, wondering how he could be so at ease, when he himself was finding it hard to sit still. The craving for a smoke began clawing at him.

‘Noel,’ he said, ‘I need a smoke. I’m going around to the back.’

Noel nodded as Dev got up and made his way through the crowd, heading to the dimly lit pathways in the gardens behind the hotel.

Myna spotted him standing up and saying something to Noel, before he turned and began moving away through the crowds. She looked around to see if she could see her mother. She needed to make this getaway before her mother got hold of her. Feeling relieved when she couldn’t spot her, she followed the route that Dev had taken.

The pathways were lit by garden lights along the sides, and Dev walked slowly along. He reached a little clearing with some garden couches grouped around a table, comfortable cushions inviting people to sit and talk. An ashtray stood on the table, indicating it was okay to smoke here. A group of shrubbery offered a modicum of privacy around the table, and a lamp at the center threw out a warm glow. He sat down on one of the couches, and dug in his sherwani pocket for his cigarettes. He took out the packet and pulled out a cigarette, placing it in his mouth, before patting his pockets for his Zippo.

He found it and flicked it open, striking a flame, and was just about to touch it to the cigarette, when he heard a low voice say, ‘I hate the smell of cigarettes.’

*****

Noel grinned as he watched Myna follow Dev’s path. For God’s sake, Dev! he thought. Don’t fuck it up this time, too!

With that little prayer sent, he went looking for Mitul. He found Kamini instead.

‘Hi, Aunty,’ he greeted her.

‘Looking for Mitul?’ she asked him.

‘Yes,’ he answered. It was amazing how at ease with her he now was. ‘Where’s she?’

‘Mitul’s helping Jiya change, so she’s going to take a little while.’

‘Oh,’ he felt disappointed and it showed on his face. She patted his back, and he blushed.

‘Take it easy, my son, she’s not running away from you,’ she grinned at him. ‘Help yourself to some food,’ she added, before walking away.

Only to run into Kuntala.

‘Didi, where is Dev?’ she asked. Kamini was taken aback. Uh-oh! Like Noel, she’d noticed Dev and Myna make their separate ways out. Mitul had pointed him out to her earlier. This was so not the time for Kuntala to go looking for him, especially when Dev had no clue who Kamini was!

‘He was sitting with Noel.’ She pretended to look for him and then said, ‘must have gone to the bathroom or something. I don’t see him.’

‘Oh!’

‘Yeah. Why don’t we go sit down somewhere, and when I see him, I’ll introduce you to him,’ she promised. ‘There’s such a crowd here, it’s a mercy you can find anybody in it.’ she added for good measure, while leading her sister-in-law away in the opposite direction.




*****

He shut the lighter, stood up and turned around. She stood there in the gloaming, lit by the lamp that shone on her face, the yellow of her sari turning into a golden pool, shimmering with silver. She looked like something out of a painting, her exquisite beauty bringing a lump to his throat. Her eyes were wide, as she walked towards him, stopping a few feet away. She must be wearing lenses, he thought in a very abstract part of his brain.

He realized that he still had the cigarette in his mouth. He tossed it into the ashtray. Picked up the packet next to it, crumpled it and threw it in the bin.

She frowned, puzzled.

‘If you don’t like it, I won’t do it,’ he answered her unspoken question.

She recoiled at that. ‘Why does my liking or not liking something make any difference to you?’

He stared at her for a moment. This was so not how he’d planned it. He knew he was going to have to wing it now!

‘It. Does. And don’t pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about, Myna,’ his voice was low, gravelly.

‘I don’t have a clue,’ she said firmly. She turned around.

And then he heard himself say, ‘So what’s he like?’ What?! Had he just said that? he thought incredulously.

‘What’s who like?’ she asked, puzzled, turning back to face him again.

‘Oh! now you’re going to tell me you don’t know WHO I’m talking about, Myna? The man you met this week. The NRI. The one you’re marrying,’ his tone accusatory. He couldn’t believe the words coming out of his mouth! He had no control over his feelings where she was concerned and it seemed like, neither did his mouth!

‘I don’t see how it’s any of your business,’ she snapped at him, her eyes glittering with anger in the dim light. ‘My marriage has nothing to do with you.’

He walked over to her, stood very close. She didn’t back down, holding his eyes as tiny red flags flamed on her cheeks.

The back of his fingers brushed against them. Her eyelids dropped, but she wouldn’t close her eyes. His fingers trailed to her lips, stopped, as his thumb traced their soft, full outline. She parted them, as she drew a quick breath. He could see her eyes darken, but she continued looking at him.

‘It is my business,’ he whispered against her lips, before he bent down and touched her lips with his.

It was nothing like their first kiss. There was no anger, no frustration. Just a deep want to show her what she meant to him, and a little bit of desperation. To keep her with him. No other man was going to touch her the way he wanted to.

He didn’t hold her, didn’t touch her. Their only point of contact was their lips. She was free to leave if she wanted to, if she didn’t want this. She didn’t draw back.

He brushed her lips with his again, swallowing as he tasted the raspberry flavor of her gloss. He was never going to eat raspberries again! He sucked her lower lip into his mouth, learning the softness of it with his tongue. Licking each tiny corner.

Her hands came up clutching at his sherwani collar, her knees barely holding her up, her heart jack hammering in her chest. He clenched his fists with the need to hold her. But he kept his hands at his sides.

He pulled at her upper lip, tugging it lightly with his teeth. His open mouth closed over hers, tongue slipping between them, only to find hers open and waiting. The tip of his tongue touched hers, and she crumbled!

She moaned into his mouth, and his hands came up to her waist. His fingers dug into it, before soothing the pain of his grip with his fingertips. Her back beckoned him. He flattened his hands so he could feel her skin on every inch of his palms.

This might be the last time he kissed her. The thought of that sent him plunging his tongue into her mouth, desperately trying to make a memory of it. Tasting every bit of her. Every nook and cranny. Until her tongue stroked his, soothing him. Taking a taste of him, tentatively, then more boldly. Telling him that she wanted to make a memory of him, too, as her hands around his neck urged him closer. He pulled her to him, wrapped her in his arms, his hips pushing into hers. Showing her, letting her feel his need for her, as his tongue plundered her mouth.

They drew back slowly, gasping for air. He let his hands trail down her arms, memorizing the feel of her skin. He stepped back. Looked at her face for one long instant, before he said in a voice hoarse with pain.

‘Now tell me you’ll be able to kiss your husband like that.’ He turned around and walked away.

She stood stunned for a moment, her fingers against her lips. Then she said, ‘I’m not marrying him.’

He stopped. She saw his shoulders straighten, and swallowed, praying he wouldn’t walk away this time. He turned around slowly, and then came back towards her with urgent steps. He gripped her upper arms and pulled her close.

‘Explain,’ he gritted, his brown eyes narrowed in an unnamed emotion, burning into hers.

‘I’m not marrying him. I’m not marrying anybody. I’d already said no,’ she said, no longer frightened of the look on his face. Instead, she was exhilarated as she stared at him, the adrenaline rushing through her veins, a slow smile forming on her face.

‘Why?’ he breathed.

She placed her hands on his chest, glorying in the racing heartbeat she found, knowing she was the reason it beat so fast. ‘I need to find myself first, Dev. For too long, I’ve been living as a taker. I expected the world to fall at my feet. I was told that if I wanted to have something, I had to reach out my hand and it would be mine. But now,’ she shook her head.

‘Now?’ he asked, tentatively. What did this mean to them? this thing between them?

‘I realized that I have to work to get what I want. And the first thing I want is to understand who I am. So I finally got this job. I’ve started working at a small design firm. I’m finding it a challenge to work for what I want, use the talents that I’ve been given to get it. Not have it drop into my lap. And I’m loving it. I want... no, I need to do this for myself. I need to prove to myself that I am worth something!’ she looked at him with pleading eyes, hoping he would understand.

He stood still for a moment. Then he lifted the palm that lay against his heart, and kissed it, a slow deep kiss that tingled all the way down to their toes.

‘I understand,’ he whispered against her palm. He held it close to his chest, before sliding his arms around her waist, tugging her in just a little closer.

‘And I want to be there, with you, for you, on that journey. By you, every step of the way.’ He paused. ‘That is, if you will let me?’

She nodded her head. She smiled, that million-watt smile of hers, dazzling him.

‘Yes, I would like that,’ she replied huskily.

He dipped his head and caught her mouth with a kiss that said thank you. He drew back.

He smiled at her, taking in the beautiful flush on her face, the hours and days of agony a thing of the past. He was okay with this. As long as she knew what he felt about her, he was okay with it. There would be no great declarations of love. When the time came and she was ready to hear it, he would give it to her. For now, he was willing to let her set the pace.

But first, some little rules needed to be set out, and he wanted her to set them.

‘Can I call you?’ he asked. She smiled and nodded.

‘Lunch next week?’ he pushed his luck.

She grinned at that. ‘Call me and we’ll see,’ she said saucily.

He laughed at that, tucking her hand in his arm, as he led her back.

‘And Dev,’ she added. He raised his eyebrows, what? ‘No more cigarettes,’ she admonished.

‘Why would I need a narcotic when I’ve got you?’ he quipped.

‘You don’t have me yet,’ she countered, as they walked back to the hotel.

*****